I can't believe we made it to a year. I am in awe of you and God's work. I just didn't think we would make it.
All these memories keep popping up on my facebook page. Happy photos of my baby bump. This time the journey was supposed to be different. And yes it was, just not the different I thought it would be.
I am grateful for the journey we have been on. No-one really understands it but us. I have sacrificed alot in this past year but believe me the sacrifices were totally worth it.
I never knew that somebody so tiny could teach me about strength. I mean I always thought I was a strong person but I also knew my strength had limits. The day you were born you showed me that I was stronger than I could ever imagine. And after experiencing prematurity I can face anything.
When you were born I wasn't even wake to see you, to hear you cry for the first time. I only got to meet you 9 hours after your birth. It was super scary. You were so tiny, literally skin and bones. I couldn't fathom how you would ever make it. I was scared. I cried for 4 days straight. I felt like I was going to loose my mind and I couldn't understand why God would do this to me. After everything we had been through why me.
But now I know why. Sometimes we loose sight of what is important in life. We are so busy trying to build the "perfect life" at the cost of everything else. I thought that as a working parent I was being the best parent. But never being present for your kids is not living. For 10 years I worked, I worked hard, but I missed out on so much with your brother.
God needed to give me pause. For 54 days all I did was focus on you. And every day was different. Some days were really good and we could see the end of the tunnel and other days were really bad that I thought we would never make it.
I have to give credit to your dad. He is a man amongst men. Things weren't always easy between us. But from your conception till now you have changed both of us and made our marriage better. Thank you son.
I have never seen a man more dedicated to his kids than your dad. He would do anything for you and your brother. You had him wrapped around your little finger from the moment he saw you. You guys bonded instantly. And since he was the first one to see you out of the two of us, you have had a special bond.
Dad would go to work every day and come and see you every night. He prayed all the time. He would go to bed at 12 just so that he could phone the hospital to make sure you were ok.
Not many men would do that and hope that you will one day become a great man like him.
I've been hugging and kissing you even more this past week (is that even possible?) because I couldn't see past day one let alone 365 days later.
I wish you all God's greatest blessings son. And I thank you for teaching me so much over this past year. I cannot wait to see what the next year as install for us.
XOXO, Mom.
