Would you believe over the past year I have heard so many stories about fathers fighting the justice system, trying to get to see their kids, trying to be involved in their children's lives, even fighting for maintenance.It has shocked me to say the least.
Just like how everything else in life has evolved so have the roles of fathers. Fathers are no longer those people that just sit on the side lines and watch from a distance. Nope. These 21st century dad's are just as involved as the mothers. Hell some of them are playing both mom and dad. Yes I know that alot of woman have been doing it for years and that I am not accrediting them for it but this side of the spectrum is for those unheard voices. Woman we are lucky that law in most countries around the world were designed to protect us, because let's face it, for a long time alot of men ran from their responsibilities.
But with times changing and men becoming active fathers, should our laws not be changed and designed to meet these new roles?
People stood up and fought for woman's right. People stood up and fought for racism to end. People stood up and fought for the right to vote (and the list goes on and on). But why are we all not standing up to fight for the men that do want to be full time dads? Why are we always (especially as woman) so ready to stand by our girlfriends and back them up when they need to go claim for maintenance, but no-one wants to hear the father's plight?
I recently heard a story about a father that was raising his twin boys and whose mother did not give them any financial assistance. Now had this been a mother who was raising her twin sons and the father was not paying maintenance all it would take would be one visit to the courthouse and the father's salary would be garnished for the funds. But unfortunately because the way our justice system is designed he has to continually go to court to get some sort of compensation, which till today has headed no results.
Another story I heard was of a man who had been paying maintenance for his 2 children for the past 6 years. Upon pursuing paternity results (which took over a year to get a court order to summons the woman for the tests) it was found that he was not the father of any of the children. What became of all the money that he had spent on the children? Nothing. Had it been the other way round the man would've immediately been summons to pay all arrears or go to jail.
And the stories continue.
I am living for the day when our laws are changed, hell I want to be a part of that change. I'm even thinking of starting some sort of organisation.
If there is any dad's out there who are going through similar circumstances, please do sound off in the comments or mail me your story. These men are real people, with real feelings, who also deserve a voice and a chance to be heard and seen.
Xoxo T
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